Costco parking. I turn into the Costco parking to attend the big box warehouse store. The entrance is 2/3 back in the lot and to the right are zero spots to park. None. To the left, the furthest 1/3, is a desert. To the right, the aisles are jammed with cars waiting for someone to finish loading. What's going on?
1. Getting closer is a matter of principle, because it doesn't make sense.
2. Getting closer is a Costco status symbol.
3. The closest spots are akin to winning the Costco lottery.
4. What is it that the heart and health experts tell us about parking remote and walking? They need to rework that advertising campaign. Any volunteers?
5. Parking left is for those with low park esteem.
6. Those on the left need an oxygen mask; they are on a different planet.
7. Fire your personal trainer and park on the left.
8. People who decide to take the binocular lot (you need binoculars to see Costco from there) walk on average faster. I watched a lady with tall boots and loud staccato-like heels pounding the blacktop attempting to make-up for lost time. She didn't want to be seen close to the socially unacceptable far lot. Trust me; it's embarrassing. She was proving that she could get to the front entrance in the same time as she would if she parked in the close lot. She's beating the system and she wants everyone to know it.
9. Don't you want to walk a distance to rid yourself of calories gained by eating 17 Costco samples inside?
10. Once someone is in Costco, are they as efficient in their shopping cart travel route as they are in finding a close parking spot? I don't think so. Will they really notice the extra 40 yards of walking after legging 2 miles down the concrete Costco aisles?
11. With gas prices so high, sitting there idle, engine running, waiting for someone to wedge in their industrial sized toilet paper pack is doing several things:
a. Contributing to fuel shortage.
b. Polluting. Cough. Cough.
c. Two words: ozone layer.
d. Blocking three other cars at idle---multiply a., b., and c. by three times and move back five spaces.
e. Three more words: Parking Lot Rage.
12. This is scientific. People who shop at Costco eat more. They need the exercise.