Immoral and Unhappy: Fornication Does Not Make Teens Happy

Our society constantly bombards adults, teens, and children with the message that sexual immorality is central to a happy life.  Television shows countless acts of fornication, but either almost never or entirely never shows a normal happily married family, and never shows a Christian happily married family; were the television the judge, one would think that people engaged in fornication, in same-sex wickedness, and other vile perversions vastly outnumber the number of normal people, and that the most unhappy, twisted, and terrible people were those who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and attempt to follow the Bible.

Growing up as an unconverted child and teenager, it was simply assumed that it would be wonderful to commit fornication.  That was the constant message of the media and the brainwashing of the educational system.  This lie was not even opposed by the Roman Catholic school I went to up through eighth grade, and certainly was not opposed by the secular education I received after that time.  With a raging sinful flesh, under the domination of a Satanically-controlled world, and in the realm of the devil himself (Ephesians 2:1-3), my peers and I assumed that sexual immorality was key to happiness.

Of course, the Bible tells a different story--the pleasures of sin are only for a season (Hebrews 11:25), the born-again can "rejoice in the Lord alway" (Philippians 4:4), and the unregenerate are currently under the awful curse of God for their sin (Galatians 3:10; John 3:18).  Indeed, the "unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God[.] Be not deceived: neither fornicators . . . nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind . . . nor covetous . . . shall inherit the kingdom of God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-10). Fornicators are both under God's wrath here and will suffer the unimaginably awful torments of hell fire for all eternity, reaping the appropriate everlasting fiery judgment for indulging in their burning lusts.

Unsurprisingly--but yet oh-so-rarely proclaimed in our culture--the evidence of social science agrees with the Bible.  While as unconverted teens we all thought, and were constantly told, that immorality would make us happy, reality in God's world tells a totally different story: 

• "Sexually active teenagers are more likely to be depressed and attempt suicide. . . . Similarly, girls who reported three or more partners were significantly more likely to report sadness, suicide ideation, suicide plans, and attempts than those with fewer partners." 

• Teenage boys and girls who are sexually active are three to four times as likely to say that they are depressed "all, most, or a lot of the time" as those who abstain.

• Immoral girls are nearly three times more likely to attempt suicide, and immoral boys are eight times more likely to attempt to murder themselves.

• Nearly two-thirds of teenagers who have lost their virginity wish they had waited and not committed fornication.

Thus, in addition to facts such as that immoral youth ages 15-24 acquire half of all new sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), that one in four teens is infected with an STD every year, that one in four college students has an STD, and that many sexually transmitted diseases are incurable and will be with the immoral person until his or her (probably unseasonably early) death, even the large majority of those who do not get infected with a disease wish they had not been immoral.  Not only do fornicators inherit an eternal hell, but they also reap misery--not pleasure--in this life.

However, when I was growing up, not only did I never hear the gospel, nor did I consider that fornication would lead me to hell, but I do not remember ever--not even once, and that despite going to a "religious" school up through eighth grade--being confronted with the facts above that show that sexual immorality leads to misery in this life.  We were warned that doing drugs brought trouble--while there were influences both for and against drugs, at least the message that doing drugs was really dumb and messed you up got out.  The message that sexual immorality was really dumb and messed you up did not get out--only the message that it was lots of fun and something everyone should desire.

Proverbs 5:1-13 warns:

1 My son, attend unto my wisdom, and bow thine ear to my understanding: 2 That thou mayest regard discretion, and that thy lips may keep knowledge. 3 For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: 4 But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword. 5 Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell. 6 Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them. 7 Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth. 8 Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house: 9 Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel: 10 Lest strangers be filled with thy wealth; and thy labours be in the house of a stranger; 11 And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed, 12 And say, How have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof; 13 And have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined mine ear to them that instructed me!

God warned that those who followed the strange, heathen, or pagan woman would mourn with their flesh and body consumed, but we thought that getting on with a heathen woman was the key to happiness--a message that teenagers will have pounded into them thousands and thousands of times.

I thank God that, in the Lord's great mercy, despite my wicked heart and my wicked desires I was able to hear the gospel and turn to Christ as a freshman in college before I ruined my life through sexual immorality.  I thank God for His infinite mercy in delivering me from my sin and enabling me to be kept by His grace for my wife and her alone.  I have no regrets about that--none whatsoever--it is a matter of great joy.  Avoid the strange woman of the early parts of Proverbs and you can have the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31, Solomon told his son.  Fantastic advice!

Do the people in your church know the facts in this blog post?  Do they know that fornication not only brings God's eternal curse, but misery in this life as well, and that research validates the teaching of Scripture on this subject?  Is that a message that they hear even 1% as often as they hear the worldly, fleshly, and demonic lie that saturates our culture and declares that immorality makes one happy?

If you are reading this and have no power to conquer your lusts, click here to learn about how the deliverance from sin purchased by the risen Lord, Jesus Christ, can shatter the dominion of sin in your life.

-TDR